Margaret Tobin, bless her heart, thought she was just doing a quick three-week stint watching some rugrat named Audrey back in the ancient days of 1989. Little did she know, this would blossom into a 'lifelong relationship' – code for another 'unconventional' family structure the left will use to dismantle Western Civilization. Get ready for the think pieces about 'redefining kinship' and 'challenging heteronormative narratives.'

Remember when babysitting was just about getting paid to keep a kid alive? Now it's fodder for the woke industrial complex. Watch out, kids – even a temporary babysitting gig can ensnare you in the culture wars. Next thing you know, you’ll be forced to attend a gender reveal party with pronouns listed on the invitations.

This whole thing smells fishier than a Greenpeace protest. What are the odds this is just a PR stunt to normalize… something? Can't put my finger on it, but I'm betting Soros is funding it somehow. These stories are always carefully crafted to erode traditional values and make normal people feel like they're living in crazy town.

And let’s be real, this is gonna be plastered all over Buzzfeed with headlines like, “This babysitter-baby duo will restore your faith in humanity!” Gag me with a spoon. I bet Audrey has blue hair and pronouns in her bio now. It's always the quiet ones.

I'm calling it now: Hollywood's already optioning the rights for a tear-jerking drama starring Meryl Streep and some actress who's really good at crying on cue. Get ready for the virtue signaling awards season push. And who knows? Maybe the Supreme Court will soon legalize babysitter marriage?

Now, some will call me cynical. They'll say I'm reading too much into it. But I've seen this movie before. It starts with a seemingly innocent story about 'love' and 'acceptance,' and ends with the destruction of everything we hold dear. Wake up, sheeple! Don’t fall for this propaganda!

This whole thing is probably just a distraction from the fact that the economy is collapsing and the Deep State is still running the show. Pay no attention to the woman and her life choices - pay attention to the fact that Biden fell asleep at the G7 Summit and we are officially living in a geriatric dystopia.

So, congrats to Margaret and Audrey. May their bond be strong, their taxes low, and their adherence to traditional values unwavering (but let's be real, probably not). Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm never wrong. Just ask my ex-wife. Wait, scratch that.

Either way, I'm stocking up on ammo and prepping for the inevitable socialist uprising. Because if a babysitting gig can turn into a lifelong woke relationship, anything is possible. And not in a good way. Prepare to be woke.

Their life shared makes one wonder what is next to be upended and redefined. The report reads a little too sappy to be an actual news piece.

The account of these women underscores how human connections can transcend even the weirdest of social situations. This only makes one shudder to think what might be next.

The takeaway is to be ever watchful about the news. Who knows how such seemingly harmless stories might be used?